Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Tyler Perry's "Why did I make the same movie..again?" TOO

Pictured to the left is Tyler Perry. You know him as the director of “Tyler Perry’s: People Perpetuating horrible African-American Stereotypes at Some Form of Family Gathering” Parts 1-18. He is also the star of the popular “I’m dressed as a Sassy Grandma…again” series of films of which there are only about 5 volumes I believe. Unfortunately the picture to the left is just a movie poster, because it would be great if somebody would actually throw this insufferable douchebag in jail.

I’m stating the obvious when I say that Hollywood is a cookie cutter industry. You’ve got the new trend in chick flicks where they just throw 57 famous actors/actresses together in a movie with no semblance of a plot..and girls go see it. You’ve got “Dudes racing supped-up cars REALLY FAST” parts 1-10. There’s Adam Sandler making a shitty bro-comedy every time he realizes that Rob Schneider needs work. Even the great Bobby DeNiro is reprising his role as “Intimidating father-in-law gives Ben Stiller the evil eye for 2 hrs”: “I mean…his name’s FOCKER…which sounds like FUCKER.” That shit’s funny…

Anyways, I get it. If you’re an actor in Hollywood most of the movies you make are gonna be paycheck flicks. Scorsese only makes one film a year, and there are only a few supporting roles available for people not named DiCaprio. And if you’re a director, once you find a formula that always brings in the cheddar, stick to it. Note to Michael Bay “If you blow lots of shit up…they will come.”

That being said at least none of these aforementioned actors/directors is exploiting his culture and encouraging racial stereotyping just to make a buck. Every Tyler Perry movie is exactly the same. There is an African-American family. They get together for a family reunion…or a wedding…or a picnic. Every member of the family is packing mad attitude. They all get into it with each other and say “DAMN!” a lot. Mayhem ensues.

America is full of ignorant assholes that probably see the ad for the new Tyler Perry flick and think that is ACTUALLY what every black family is like. I mean it’s a black guy…directing black actors…in movies about black families. Clearly this is an accurate portrayal of black family life. What makes it worse is that if you’ve ever seen this Ass-clown in interviews, he is actually polished, intelligent and well spoken, and was clearly raised in an African-American household nothing like the retarded caricatures in his movies. We’re not talking about “Larry the Cable Guy” making movies about being a redneck and saying “Git R Done.” We KNOW that asshole is a redneck that likes embracing his umm..“culture.”

Tyler Perry’s films have apparently grossed $400 million dollars. In 2009 Forbes listed him as the 6th highest paid man in Hollywood. That is INSANE. And at least before his idiotic formulaic “comedies” were only put on the big screen where I could avoid it. Now he has brought his stupid blaxploitation humor to TV with not one, but two sitcoms (“House of Payne,” “Meet the Browns”) that my dog could have written the script for. The concept?? Two black families. Fighting like cats and dogs. Being sassy and saying DAMN a lot. Hilarity ensues.

(BTW quick side note.) Fuck you TBS. WTF is with the whole “TBS: Very Funny” ads? You show “Everybody Loves Raymond” re-runs, Tyler Perry sitcoms, the George Lopez show, and Nicolas Cage movies on the weekend. I find nothing “Very Funny” about your programming. Seriously, TBS Execs = child molesters and puppy killers. Fact.

Anyways, I digress. Long story short, as long as this jackass is reeling in the dollars at the box office he is going to make his shitty movies and perpetuate racial stereotypes. Hopefully some of the actors that take paychecks to be in his movies will at some point realize what they’re doing and say “No I’m not gonna act like a caricature of an ignorant black dude at a family picnic in your fucking shitty movie.” And hopefully some of the people that go to the theaters to see these movies, and fund his career will find some better way to spend their Friday night. Until then however, stay tuned for “Tyler Perry’s: My baby mama says DAMN for 2 hours and makes a scene…at a family picnic” coming to a theatre near you this fall.

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